ocean-storm-wave-ship-wreck

「船」

昨晚看了「王德順–最炫東北人」在「一席」演說的視頻,才知道王德順這個人大有來頭。他不只是一位頂尖的藝術家,他可是中國的活寶。 在演講最後,他以白樺的一首詩「船」做結束語。我哭了。 我有過多次這樣的奇遇, 從天堂到地獄只在瞬息之間; 每一朵可愛、溫柔的浪花, 都成了突然崛起、隨即傾倒的高山。 每一滴海水都變臉變色, 剛剛還是那樣美麗、蔚藍; 旋渦糾纏著旋渦, 我被拋向高空又投進深淵…… 當時我甚至想到過輕生, 眼前一片苦海無邊; 放棄了希望就象放棄了舵柄, 在暴力之下只能沈默和哀嘆。 今天我才有資格嘲笑昨天的自己, 為昨天落葉似的惶恐感到羞慚; 虛度了多少年華, 船身多次被礁石撞穿…… 千萬次在大洋里撒網, 才捕獲到一點點生活的經驗, 才恍然大悟, 啊!道理原是如此淺顯: 你要航行嗎? 必然會有千妖百怪出來阻攔; 暴虐的欺凌是它們的遊戲, 製造滅亡是它們唯一的才幹。 命中注定我要常常和它們相逢, 因為我的名字叫做船; 面對強大於自身千萬倍的對手, 能援救自己的只有清醒和勇敢。 恐懼只能使自己盲目, 盲目只能誇大魔鬼的猙獰嘴臉; 也許我的樣子比它們更可怕, 當我以生命相拼,一往無前! 只要我還有一根完整的龍骨, 絕不駛進避風的港灣; 把生命放在征途上, 讓勇敢來決定道路的寬窄、長短。 我完完全全的自由了, 船頭成為埋葬它們的鐵鏟; 我在波浪中有節奏地跳躍, 就象蕩著一個巨大的鞦韆。 即使它們終於把我撕碎, 變成一些殘破的木片; 我不會沈淪,決不! 我還會在浪尖上飛旋。 後來者還會在殘片上認出我, 未來的詩人會喟然長嘆: “這裡有一個幸福的靈魂, 它曾經是一艘前進著的航船……”   當我聽到他朗誦這首詩時,我感觸到這首詩描述了三年前的我。我當時有想過輕生能否解決問題等等。那時我也寫了一篇博文–The Abyss of Depression…

Crying young woman

Breakup – A True Story

After a 5-kilometer run and calisthenics workout at the park last evening, I decided to go get some groceries for the week. It was around 19:45 and it was dark. I walked from the car park towards the supermarket. Passing by a cafe, I noticed a young couple sitting at a table. They were roughly…

poetry-4

Wind Beneath The Wings

I was inspired by an image from Alayna Kaelyn, a photographer and writer, from Seattle Washington. I downloaded her photo and designed the graphics. Then I wrote this quote for inspiration. Be the bridge between the faith and hope, be the wind beneath the wings.

I Will Remember You

Two years have gone by. How are you doing? My best wishes.

Just One Last Dance

Two years ago, today, we had one last dance and parted ways. Yes, I remember and will always remember.

blue-xray-brain-medium copy

Living with Asperger Syndrome

Asperger Syndrome or Asperger’s or High-Functioning Autism (HFA) is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Unfortunately, I am such a complicated man with a brain wired as such. As an alleged high-functioning Asperger’s together with adult ADHD-PH (Hyperactivity or Impulsive type) and clinical bipolar disorder mixed-type, it’s hard to live or to have intimate relationship without…

愛的領悟

當我看到我深愛過的女人 竟然像孩子一樣無助 這何嘗不是一種領悟 讓我把自己看清楚 我們的愛若是錯誤 願你我沒有白白受苦 若曾真心真意付出 就應該滿足 多麼痛的領悟 你曾是我的全部 只願你掙脫情的枷鎖 愛的束縛 任意追逐 別再為愛受苦 ‪#‎endofrelationship‬

這首歌描述我去澳洲之前和當時在澳洲的心境。多謝各位兄弟姊妹的關懷、照顧和幫忙。有你們的陪伴,讓我渡過艱難的時刻,讓我找到我的方向。從悉尼至布利斯本那漫長和孤獨的旅途上,我遇到了一顆明亮和美麗的星。她,引導了我走上我應走的方向,走出茫茫迷途。你們都是我生命中的一顆星。在此我想以這首歌獻給大家,謝謝各位的支持和關懷。我希望各位也盡快找到您們要走的方向。真的很想念你們,很想再跟你們到田野一齊幹(活)。😁😎

standingman

Standing Man — Cтоя человека!

“No matter how hard the life ahead is, stand back up after every each time it has beaten you up. Eventually it will let you live. Stand your ground. Be persistent. Be standing man, Cтоя человека!” — Adrian Hoe, inspired by the movie Bridge of Spies, Nov 4 2015.

緣盡 (End of Fate)

緣盡 (End of Fate) 碰不到緣份並不是一件很慘的事。最慘的事就是兩個人相愛而彼此都很希望和大家一起但是發覺已經是緣盡。 接受緣盡,放下怨恨,改善當下,放眼未來。 當妳接受緣盡放下怨恨,妳會比較輕鬆和快樂。 祝妳快樂健康。 The saddest thing is not about we are unable to meet a person in fate but is when two persons were in love and hoped to be able to spend the entire lifetime together, only realize the fate has ended. Accept the end of fate and let…

無所謂

無所謂,誰會愛上誰。 曾有過的幸福,是短暫的美。 錯與對,不是那麼絕對。 請原諒我所有的不對。 放過了自己,我才能高飛。 我祝願妳們倆快樂,幸福。

Version 2

Jaafar and I

“When two human beings of different culture and language meet, all they need is a sincere heart to surpass any barrier which divides them. ”  — Adrian Hoe, Feb 12, 2015 Down under. When I arrived at the Swan Hill train station in the afternoon of February 12, 2015, the air conditioner was blowing cold air with full blast. The…